KISSINGER FOR PRACTICE

Seb is 11. His dad, while not himself an aging hipster doofus, shares musical taste with the aging-hipster-doofus demographic.

The other night, the two were driving home from gymnastics practice and Comfy in Nautica by Panda Bear was streaming on the car stereo. Seb remarked with some degree of bemusement, "I can never understand what they're saying in the lyrics to your music!"

When they reached the driveway, this led to a brief game, wherein Seb's dad played a song verse by verse and asked Seb to verbally transcribe the lyrics as he heard them.

And that brings us to the remit of this site: providing Seb's interpretations of lyrics from a broad array of aging-hipster-doofus favs.

Ever wonder what a pre-teen thinks Mumbly Joe was going on about in Radio Free Europe? Well friend, you've come to the right place...